Zack Snyder Sucks
An examination and explanation of why this overrated director needs to take a break from filmmaking.
Here we are again: Zack Snyder has released a new movie and has already claimed there is a better, longer version on the horizon. The only difference this time is that he told us there was going to be one before this movie, Rebel Moon, even came out. I ask him, why even watch this version of the movie, which is already over two hours, or it’s sequel, if there will just be a “better” cut released soon after anyway?
Now, let me just admit something up front. I have not been a fan of Zack Snyder since he ruined The Watchmen with his terrible adaptation. I understand that some people enjoyed the movie, but if they did, I don’t think they ever read the source material. He changed so much of the central plot, including the ending, that it wasn’t even the same story. A lot of folks who rally to his defense attempt to explain that the movie was just ahead of its time. Now, I’m sorry, but just because he released a violent superhero story a decade before The Boys and Invincible, doesn’t make it ahead of its time.
The Boys comic released in 2006, and Invincible released in 2003. Another example of mature superhero storytelling is Spawn, and that was released in the 90’s along with its animated show and its own movie. So don’t tell me audiences weren’t ready for a spicy superhero movie by 2009. The reason no one liked it was because it sucked. The only people who like it are Snyder fanboys who have gone back to watch it after his stint with DC and are attempting to justify its garbage existence. Seriously, if you want to see a good adaptation of The Watchmen, I recommend HBO’s sequel series. It is honestly just so much better than Snyder’s.
Along with his mistreatment of one of my favorite comics, I just find most of his movies incredibly boring, dark, and dull. He uses slow motion to such an extent one could argue that 1/8th of his movies runtime could be cut if he would just leave that shit out instead of slowing down the action. You can even identify when it started. Everyone remembers that scene in 300 when Leonidas kicks that dude off of the cliff. It was badass. He used a lot of slow motion in that movie with the intention, I’m assuming, to show off frames of Frank Miller’s comic that inspired it.
I can understand that, and it created an iconic scene that rippled through the late 2000’s pop culture. He saw that and was like, “Wow, people really liked that. I’m just going to do that sevenfold in every movie for the rest of my life because that’s what people like.” A common issue a lot of people have with his later movies are that they are too long and use so much of this style of cinematography. Why he isn’t picking up on the fact that people are over it by now, and have been for years, is beyond me.
Another one of his movies that people argue is too long is Army of the Dead. The reason for this is, yes, the slo-mo, and that he puts way too many characters in them, without ever giving any of them enough depth for you to even start to give a shit. Netflix touted this as one of the most watched movies of the time, but that’s easy to do when the movie is 200 plus minutes long and everyone falls asleep in the first quarter. A couple other things about this one is that it didn’t really need to have a spin off because honestly no one gave that much of a shit and apparently it is connected to his new movie, Rebel Moon. How is it connected? In a deleted scene, one of the characters goes through a portal and meets another character from the other movie. He’s touting some giant cinematic universe and that all his upcoming projects are related, but the only way they are related is in a single scene that no one will ever see. Honestly, what the fuck is this guy even talking about?
Now, I can only give him so much of a hard time because I genuinely did like his first film, Dawn of the Dead. This, however, was probably due to the fact that it was written by James Gunn, the man who DC would elect to replace him as the head of the DC movies going forward. I don’t know if that’s irony, but it definitely is funny. While I did like that movie, it doesn’t really make up for the rest of his catalog being garbage. Don’t even get me started on the fucking “Martha” scene in Batman v Superman.
Truly, I think Zack needs to take a few years off and reflect. Maybe watch some decent movies and look at what they do well. Sure, he knows how to make a good-looking movie, but he needs to flesh out his characters more. He needs to slow down with the slo-mo. Most importantly, he needs to get in touch with some better writers for his films,not a bunch of yes-men who are only there to stroke his ego and get a paycheck.
